OH YES the friggin' prelims are in two weeks!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Guess how much I've studied, uh huh. Just got the time-table and everything else sucked.

O's, I want to get it over and done with. Same goes for you Prelims. You're all going downnnn!!!!!!!!

x x x

Let me shake up your world

Sometimes people read too much into things, I know I do. It might be a good, it might be a bad thing, it depends.

Suddenly, I miss my bangs more than ever, my not so layered hair, i want it to grow back again. But i kept telling myself, now is not the time, now it's not the right time. Then i will ask myself again, then when is the right time?! For you see my internal conflicts are damn !@#%$%!!~!!!

1st floor of Block D blacked out ytd!!! Super funny. Physics is still NOT my thang, damn it.

Life is lifeless today. Thanks to Project Runway I slept at 12mn the day before. -.- I was so tired, the first three periods (mind you, its the heaviest, omg) were sooooo longggg it never seemed to end. During Chem test (which was killerrrr but I don't know why I thought i'm prepared?) I was so tired i slept during the 25 min paper. -.- I guess my mind can't think without enough oxygen, alamak. I'm going to sleep early tonight, though tmr don't really matter because we're gonna celebrate Youth Day! :D

Oh yes and SS in the lab for the third week in a row (I secretly wish that we won't ever complete what we have to do so we got the excuse to go back to the com lab ^^) and i showed Jy the emails between us two last year. SUPER FUNNY I TELL YOU. If the fonts don't look so weird I would have pasted em here and i promise you'll get fong shi while reading it HAHAHAHA (inside joke :B)

Anyway, I the Tomato had SUBWAY (Y) @ Tamp1 for lunch today with Shermin Ty Jong Jong & APPLE! :D My usual tuna w/ mayo still taste so good! (Y) Then went to shop for Ty's & Shermin's shoes and i tell you, Ty has no fate with shoes hahaha.

OH YES AND COTTON ON GOT MY FAVE FAKE RAY-BAN SHADES IN RED!!!! OMGGGGG I AM SO GETTING THAT!!!!!! Please wait for momma :D

Love the girls, and Apple HAHAHA :D

Meeting Darl tomorrow, whee. It seems we're seeing each other once a month now, esp in the middle of the month, which is (Y) :D

& thank you Mw for that pouch & the very sweet note! xoxo :* Now we've got the same pouch ^^

x x x

Finally submitted my DPA application today, with 30 mins to spare, so a big big big thank you to Ms Tan for helping me to vet my character write up! Now my only worry is, what if NP didn't choose me?! What if SP or TP choose me?! Does this means I shouldn't have applied for all three schools?! I should have just applied for NP only right!!! But i don't want this scenario to happen: where NP don't choose me, and SP/TP don't even choose me, and after O's results are released I can't even go to the three of them?!?! Now i can only wait till 18 Aug. Omg damn long. ):

Finally (also) bought the school's baked potato!! DAMN (Y) SERIOUSLY!! Whoohooo love it when they added so much butter and bacon bits its just sooo goood. It would be even better if its smokin' hot!! So lunch was with the girls (Shermin Jy Tay) in school.

Had Eng summary remedial with Ms Tan and the guys. Need to re write my draft !!

Going to do some Physics laterz, + DESPERATE HOUSEWIVES! :D

OH AND AMATHS is killer now! :@

Okay tata!

x x x

Seeking solace

Sometimes, I want to hide myself, away from people, the city, everyone and everything, but then I realize that it will never work, it will never happen, because everything and everyone is inter-dependent on one another - we rely on someone or something to give us that solace we yearned. When we get that solace, we moved on, yearning for something else that will give us the solace that we once yearned. So we are always yearning, wanting, wishing, hoping, for some thing to happen. Human beings is always looking for some things that they don't have, can never have, will never have. That's how we work. and I say that's bullshit.

Cheemotology ttm. (Y) if you understand. (N) & you suck, if you don't.

I remembered my Must-do-List, but I've only done 1 Physics paper. I'm not touching the rest either.

Anyhoo I'm gonna give myself a pat in the back because I've always avoided touching Physics, but I'm glad I've started and I don't see myself stopping any time soon. I believe it's the work of the Physics camp that gave me the push, even though it was about 3 weeks ago. Still not too late I say, there's still time, though it's flying away.

Seriously got to stop blogging but I feel really peaceful and angry and guilty ALL at the same time when I do so. Grrr.

Something completely OFF-topic:

<

The last one totally made my day! :D

x x x

Get it over and done with

I should be sleeping/studying now but my hair is not dry so..

Internal conflicts still going on, when will it ever stop? After O's? Because that's when i can do SO MANY FREAKIN THANGS?! Grrrrrrrr. I'm not trying to grow up too fast, i just want to live my life to the fullest, the current, da life, and not just with books . i.e. I still HAVE NOT watched Transformers 2(!! OH MY SHIA!) and yet I love Shia soooo much!! & i wanted to watch HP but I guess i'm not interested in it already. Even the thought of watching New Moon doesn't excite me.

I don't want to regret. Ain't I regretting now? BUT I want to do well (FREAKING DISTINCTIONS YO!!!) for my O's because I KNOW I CAN (!!!!) and because I know that all these thangs can wait. The question is, do I want to wait? Must I wait? Will I be patient enough to do so?

So many dang conflicts but the main thing is O's, and nothing else!!! O's only!!! the one and only!!

Ranting might help, then i can really focus on my books after that. What a oxy-moron I am.

Must-Do-List:

1. Physics paper x 2 (!!! PRIORITY BECAUSE PHYSICS KILL!)
2. Chem paper x 2 or is it 1?
3. Emaths paper x 2
4. Emaths TYS
5. Amaths TYS
6. Literature (!!!!!!!!!!!!! i cannot afford to NOT ace this!!!! but i don't even know where to begin wtf)
7. Guess i need to do something about Humanities soon, prolly not so soon but i have to start soon. MUST START ALREADY!!! So how soon is my soon? Not so soon, very soon?

I realised that these Must-do-list/To-do-list might/will never be ticked/checked/cancelled/striked because after I close this window, read my post, and shut down, i will forget about it. -.-

(You can skip the whole chunk after this sentence.)

Another thing that should be mentioned in the previous post: Ting dreamt of Daddy a few nights ago, and she cried!! (Like i'm only sleeping beside her and i didn't even realise!? I must be such a dead log! Ok this is not my main point, my main point is..) Why didn't I ever dream of him? I always believed that dreams are just your thoughts, that's being reiterated to you in the visual form, through your eyes or someone's else, and that its sub-conscious. So does this means Daddy is not part of my sub-conscious, or is the work of God, that just because God answered Ahting's prayers that's why? Because it's unexplainable, I'm gonna point my fingers to God that its his doings that's why sis dreamt of Daddy. Guess I should be baptised too to dream of him huh? Ha

I shouldn't have changed skin because now i'm blogging daily! Why are all my words and inspirations only coming to me now when I'm not writing my journals?!?!??!

I should (should is not strong enough) MUST really REALLY REALLY stop using the net. Max 10mins to check twitter/facebook/google reader and nothing more! Die die have to scratch myself to stop my itch of using the internet!!

(OH but i haven't submit my DPA and i'm suppose to do it after Ms Tan email me LOL oxymoron again -.-)

Okay eyelids touching each other already ciao

x x x

Some pieces of puzzle are missing in my heart

I know for a fact that when I look back in time, I will laugh heartily at what happen today.

SERIOUSLY (!!!) LIKE HAHHAAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHA OMG STILL FEEL LIKE POURING WATER AT YOU SIM JIA YAN (read: lian ming dai xing!!) *holding a filled water bottle and checking that Tay & Marcus are not in between you and me!!!*

Super :O day!!!!

Today is a productive yet unproductive day. Nuff' said.

Mac breakfast for brunch (Y) Hotcakes is the bombz but they burn a hole-y in my pocket ):

Parkway for dinner with Ahting and we had CoffeeBean because she like their whole-day-breakfast-set or sth & we had pasta plus my fave mocha w/ whipped cream!! SEE QI QI JEALOUS NOT?! :D Plus not I pay eh!!

Then to Marks & Spencer and I got my fave sweets!!! Then to Mango and sis got a red rain coat which i swear she'll never get the chance to wear it in Sg. hahaha

Mum's in a part of MSIA that i don't know how to spell, and she'll be back home tmr afternoon and she didn't bring her keys out, so i have to be home -.-

& relatives from Taiwan are coming tmr night!! Sian i still got school if not i'll be going sightseeing with em'. ):

I think I need to type longer now that I got so much spaceeeee to write this sentence is not even all the way on the right side of the screen so what can i type to make it all the way to the right side of the screen? Hmmm lemme think ah... okay i'm typing as im thinking so i guess this should fill it up?? HAHAHA lame -.-

Ok bai bai!

x x x

My links are finally up! Didn't take me long at all lol :D

Maybe I never did, maybe I did..

I have 15 mins before the laptop batt goes flat, soo...

So glad to see Nurul Edmund Iskandar and the rest @ NP today! & NP Poly experience is (Y)! should've gone for the other days too!!

I got cheese fries from Makan Place + lots & lots of cheese :D

Multiple internal conflicts! There's so many things i wanna do, there's so many things I MUST DO! Like mugging for eg. -.-

Yayah is so ke ai when ta zai jiang hua yu. Like LOL!! Sometimes she understands, sometimes she don't!!

Been blogging daily now? Cus of the new skin whoohoo! Still need to get my links up, eek -.-

12 mins left..

Okay gonna blog hop/ Twitter now! :D

x x x

"Don't wanna hurt the people I care about"

I needa put up my links!!! Walao eh, didn't know it was that important!! Ha, CHERISH PEOPLE!! Okay gonna put them up over the weekends, when I'm not irritated by putting up the links. ^^

Talked a lot today, and I realized a lot of things! Intellectual talks whoohoo ^^ :B

Please know that I love you all, my friends, in many many ways ^^

i.e. STRANGLING YOU - SEE QI QI BECAUSE YOU SHAKE HAZIQ'S HANDS FIRST!!!! :@ !!! Hahahaa and then your face turned BRIGHT RED LIKE TOMATOES!!!! That is SO my joke of the day omg hahaha.

& LEE T Y thank you for your aluminium rose :D I think i'm the ONLY ONE who kept the ones you made the other time!! (*points at See Qi Qi because I think she didn't!!!!*

& SHERLYN because you were talking durians, i wrote durians for English when I was supposed to write about something else!!!!!!! :@ tsk!!!!

& JAIME hahahahhaha i am a smexy penguin!!

& JY hahahaha er ren shi jie w you today whoo hoo :P kekekekek

& MW please remember what i told ya kkk!! Talk to me, baby, whenever, wherever!! :D

& JONG JONG PLEASE GET WELL SOON!

I can't believe History didn't repeat! Perhaps things are not meant to be...?? :O

Super a lot of smiley faces because I doing them as im typing muahahahahaha :D

Gotta jettttt!

& LISTEN TO 21 GUNS - GREEN DAY!!! GO GO GO!!1

x x x

When your mind breaks the spirit of your soul

Lovin' Green Day's 21 Guns!!!

When you're at the end of the road
And you lost all sense of control
And your thoughts have taken their toll
When your mind breaks the spirit of your soul

You're in ruins..

x x x

"Other peoples lonliness is enthralling to me"

I'm not going to touch DPA for now. It's scaring the shit out of me. Big shoutouts to everyone I've asked for help, especially Yayah & Derick! Hope we all get passed DPA and get into the course of our choice wheee! :)

I'm lovin' four of my Portugese egg tarts whoohoo! :D

Desperate Housewives tonight, yo!

Good Girl Go Bad

Lovin' the new skin! And the thing that's missing is titles, omgwtfbbq.

So yes titles are totally irrelevant to this post whoohooo :)

---

DPA is killing me!! i still don't know what to write!!

x x x

(Y) nasi lemak & (Y) tau huey/youtiao/portuguese egg tart!!!!!!!

Supper is (Y) :D

Losing my drive, my motivation, my goals.

Lost it.

Couldn't find it back.

Things i wanted so badly are things that i find a chore/bore/nothing more now.

Yes i'm talking about DPA, and other things the world wide web doesn't have to know.

I thought it was lack of sleep.

Hell no.

WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME?

Can you spell unproductive? Yeah that's pre-t much how it is for me today. Damn it.

I AM SUPER SUPER SUPER DONE WITH MY JOURNALS!!!!!!

I ALSO EMAILED BOTH TO MS TAN ALREADY!

I think i will die for July journal. Since both May & June killed me already. -.-

OKAY to begin with: I will die now. PRELIMS IS A MONTH & LESS AWAY!!!!!!! & it concerns my DPA!!!!!! HOW HOW HOW!?!?!?!

Okay frigging out now.

A few thankyou(s):

Thank you JONG JONG (^^) for your PE shirt or else I'll have no PE today and I can't play badminton!!

Thank you QI QI (^^) for your black fbts or else I'll have no PE today and I can't play badminton since i was wearing white lololol!!!

Thank you JY JY (^^) for playing badminton w me AGAIN ON A FRIDAY!!!!! WHOOOOO DAMN SHIOK AND YES IF MY ARMS ARE SORE TMR YOU'LL KNOW WHY :D

Thank you Chriss for singing when we were waiting for our turn during oral. It actually calmed me down and i relaxed a whole lot when i sang along too ^^ THANK YOU!!

& YES NO SCHOOL ON MONDAY THANKS TO YOUTH DAY! ME IS A YOUTH :D

& THANK YOU TO MS TAN IN ADVANCE FOR THE PIZZAS ON TUES ! :D

I'M A HAPPY GIRL WHOOHOO!!!

----

Now.... TIME TO CATCH UP ON A LOT OF ZZZZZZ BECAUSE TGIF & TIAS (TMR IS A SAT HAHAHA I JUST MADE THAT UP :D)

And then prepare my strengths/reasons why i wanna go MASS COMM IN NP + 2 other courses but i have no decided omg omg omg/how can I contribute to the industry after i graduate & EMAIL IT TO BOTH MS TAN AND MS KOH aka XU LAO SHI (HAHAHA JY SEE THIS!!)

Okay a tad too high.

x x x

When i said "shoot me" in my previous post, you should have, because the oral is about YOG 2010 and all i think of is "err... hmmmm errrr" and my points don't sound like it made any sense!!!!!!! where did all my adjectives go to?!?!!?! wtf seriously. i should have continued with tuition and at least practice once a week for 2 hours or sth instead! Like fml big time!

Well it only made me realise that english is still da bestz!!! English fo' life yo!!!

x x x

Quick post: I KNOW HOW TO STOP GETTING DISTRACTED ALREADY! (or maybe not...)

Because ah, when i disconnect the internet i can actually concentrate and type!!

BUT NOT FOR LONG!!! SEE IM HERE AGAIN!!! Idiot -.-

But still, it's a baby step ^^ Whoohoo

OKAY I AM STILL NOT DONE WITH MY JOURNAL!

O LVL CHINESE ORAL TMR PLS SHOOT ME!!!!! AND BRING TIE EVERYONE!!!

X X X

AIM: Finish Part 1 of June journal i.e. the SYMC part by 9pm! i am left with two hours! GO ME!!

EDIT @ 9PM: You know there's 3 days of SYMC 09 right. Guess how much i'm done with: DAY ONE OF SYMC! HAHAHAHAHA I suck right. omg -.- 5 HOURS LEH. -.- Ok bye.

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EDITED @ 10.30PM: No i'm still not done with my journal, THEN WHY AM I STILL HERE!?!?!??!?!

I hate thyself. But its okay, because at the end of the it's gonna be another masterpiece. WHOO GOOOO MEEEEEEE! OLE OLE OLE!

Ha i wish.

Here's another one of the two cutie pies - I can never get enough of them. I think i've morphed them into cam-whoring freaks hahha because the one on the right aka Valencia knows how to click the button and smile and say cheese for the stupid hole on this Macbook. HAHA the next time they're coming over i'm getting them to do the many many efftects one ^^ COOL SHIT YO!

OKAY GET BACK TO FRIGGIN JOURNAL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! & I've not done EMaths hw DIE DIE DIE DIE !!!

x x x

I started my June journal around 4pm, so it has been 1.5 hours and im still at the FIRST PARAGRAPH!!!!

WHY AM I ALWAYS SO SLOW?!?!?!?!?! Walao always get distracted -.-

Kekeke they can be so annoying (which is why i don't want to raise kids), yet they're always such cutie pies!

x x x